


Today is Getting Better

by SilverGuardian (TheGuardian219)



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, Asgore Needs Hugs, Atlas - Freeform, Everyone Needs A Hug, Feels, Frisk is a Sweetheart, Gen, I don't know, Reader Is Not Frisk, Suicidal Thoughts, We Need More Tags For Asgore, Why Did I Write This?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-04
Updated: 2016-09-04
Packaged: 2018-08-12 19:18:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,645
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7946047
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheGuardian219/pseuds/SilverGuardian
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He needed to be strong for his people. The king must be strong, the Underground needn't have a sniveling fool for a king. </p><p>But sometimes it's too much. Sometimes the guilt was so heavy he couldn't even lift his head. Sometimes the pain was too much he couldn't get out of bed. Sometimes the weight of responsibility was too much his knees would almost buckle as he walked across the hall</p><p>He just wants to have his family again.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Today is Getting Better

**Author's Note:**

> Okayyyy.. this is my first fic for the Undertale Fandom. Yes, I am Undertale Trash.  
> I know Asgore may be slightly OOC but I just can't help but put a shit ton of angst in it. That and I probably won't be able to sleep properly this whole month because everyone hates our class so I'm taking it all out on fanfiction!!!
> 
> Anyway, I hope you enjoy the story. Some feedback would be nice and if you have any tips I would greatly appreciate it.
> 
> Goat Dad needs help. Help Goat Dad.

Sometimes it was too much.

Sometimes the guilt was so heavy he couldn't even lift his head. Sometimes the pain was too much he couldn't get out of bed. Sometimes the weight of responsibility was too much his knees would almost buckle as he walked across the hall.

But he was the king and the people needed him. He had to carry on. He had to let his people have hope, have dreams. He will bear the responsibilty and he will bear the guilt. Killing innocent humans broke him. He could have followed Toriel's advice and absorbed the first soul they had and retrieved the others. But, wouldn't that just bring more bloodshed? What happened to Asriel is proof that humans are just as violent as before.

If humans fell down here they had no one to blame but themselves. Who would miss them? How could other humans let their friends and family climb Mt. Ebott and not look for them?

Those were just some of the lies he told himself to justify his actions. He carried on because his people didn't need blood to stain their hands. He would carry all of it himself after all, what kind of king would he be if he didn't take care of his people?

But sometimes it was too much.

He just needed some alone time. He avoids echo flowers because he was afraid of his people talking about the time when they finally break the barrier, he couldn't stand the weight of their faith in him. So he hides away where no one can find him. He doesn't feel worthy of their praise nor their faith so he avoids listening to the flowers.

He could handle it. Even when the pain is too much. He could handle the voices of guilt and self-loathing. He could convince himself that the sharp end of a knife isn't the solution, he could talk himself out of the cool waves of waterfall or the blazing heat of hotland.

But sometimes it's too much.

He wished that they could go back in time where their children were alive, when Toriel didn't hate him and when his paws weren't stained by innocent blood. 

Atleast in the war he only killed those that wished his kind harm. 

Undyne had been a wonderful light in his darkness. A little spirit filled with determination to kick his butt. Training her has been fun, distracting. But the darkness remained.

He could fool her into thinking that everything was fine. They could drink Golden Flower Tea or hot chocolate and talk about anything. Sometime he could fool himself as well.

But sometimes it's too much.

Alphys was drowning in guilt and regret. He was the one to blame. He tried to tell her that it was fine, that it was his fault. But really, Alphys was a wreck. She may always had been a wreck but if it weren't for his orders she didn't wouldn't have to carry the burden on her shoulders.

This is exactly why he shouldn't let others see his pain.

This is exactly why this burden is his amd his alone.

But sometimes it's too much.

Frisk, the eighth human to fall managed to free them all. Seeing the sun was amazing. Feeling the fresh air was refreshing in more ways than one. He thought that everything would be okay back then. 

But Toriel still barely tolerated his presence. He stepped down from being king, not officially though since humans tended to be more polite and diplomatic while talking to someone with a flashy title, plus most of the monsters still looked up to him for guidamce.

But he could still feel the weight of guilt, hear the voices of self-loathing. He thought he could finally handle everything. 

But sometimes it's too much.

He sat in a park bench. He didn't want to face the rejection from the humans who saw him as a murdered while he asked for an apartment. He couldn't stay underground, it was far too quiet and far too tempting for  _something_ for him. No one knew that he has been sleeping in benches for two weeks now.

Frisk was the ambassador for monsters, they didn't need a king anymore. Maybe he could finally throw away the heavy weight on his shoulders even just for awhile. He sighed.

It was just too much.

* * *

"Hey, kid! Have you seen Asgore?" Undyne asked as she approached Frisk.

Frisk shook their head, asking why.

"I haven't seen him since yesterday. And I've looked everywhere."

"What did you say, Undyne?" Papyrus burst into the scene, jumping from a tree branch he has been occupying. "Is his royal highness missing?"

"No need to jump to conclusions yet, Pap." Sans replied as Papyrus sent him a glare.

"I'm getting worried. I haven't actually talked to him for awhile now." Asgore made it a point to always check on everyone atleast every few days. It isn't like him to just vanish.

Undyne and the others were discussing where he could possibly be, Sans cracking awful puns and Papyrus treathening to smack his skull.

Frisk pulled out their cellphone and dialed the king's number. It was unattended. They dialed the private number. It was also unattended. Frisk was worried now. They tried to figure out where he coukd have gone and only one place came to mind. The old spot in the woods he showed them a few days ago where flowers bloomed. They hurried hoping that Asgore won't do anything stupid.

They hurriedly ran all the while doing their best not to trip as they sent a text.

* * *

 The flowers were lovely. They came in so many colors Asgore just wanted to stare at them for eternity. While he still preferred the golden flowers underground the sight of color and the soft breeze softly hitting his fur made everything just a little bit lighter.

He built a small bench in the middle of the flowers, big enough that he could lay down for a few hours to rest if he wanted. He brought thr journal he kept in his room here with him and proceeded to write an entry.

_"Today is a beautiful day..."_

Perhaps if he wrote it often enough, he'd believe it. Perhaps if he wrote it enough times then he'd finally tear the note in the back and get rid of the only consolation price he could give himself waiting for him in his pocket.

His hand shook and he put the pen and journal aside. He couldn't show weakness, even when he was alone. He swallowed the tears and bit his thumb to stop himself.

He hasn't cried yet. The last time was before he declared the war on humans. And that was a very long time ago.

But sometimes it's too much.

The beauty surrounding him overwhelmed him. The sun, the fresh air, the flowers. All of the pain just to see all these things again, trivial things for humanity but it signified hope for his people.

He took a deep breath, finally able to compose himself. He's learned how to deal with his emotions over the years.

The soft pitter-patter of footsteps broke him out of his thoughts.

"Frisk? What are you doing over there?"

Frisk ran towards the king, jumping as the king caught them and held them.

"Everyone's looking for you." The child murmured agains his chest.

"Oh golly. I'm sorry to have worried everyone-"

"Are you ok?" Frisk raised their head as they leveled an inquisitive look towards the king of the monsters.

"What of course I am. What are you talking about, my child?" Asgore rubbed he back of his neck, pointedly avoiding eyecontact.

Frisk glared at them. Asgore still has not been able to figure out how Frisk manages to send glares with their eyes squinted like that.

"You look sad." Frisk stated. Very subtle, this kid.

 "What was that?" 

"When you think no one is looking. You look sad." Frisk gazed at him.

Asgore was taken aback. Of course Frisk would notice. He smiled at them. "It happens to everyone Frisk. Sometimes, everything just seems to be too much. But," Asgore paused. "Everything would be okay eventually." He looked at the trees in the distance, his thoughts suddenly far away.

Frisk shook their head.

"What is it, child?" The patience of the king really is astounding.

"Why did you disappear for days then?"

"I didn't disappear I was just exlporing these wood-" The king sighed. He knew Frisk wouldn't stop until he said the truth. If anything, if the child continued on looking at him like that they'd probably ask for back-up just to get him to talk.

"It's just that, I sometimes need a breather. Some time to get myself together and just be alone. Being a king is a very lonely job, my child." His tone was sombre but then he grinned. "Luckily I am no longer a king." Frisk pouted. "Don't give me that look. I am no longer a king unofficially. I'm more of a figure-head right now really. You are the one everyone is counting on to help resolve the things with humans."

He held Frisk a little tighter this time. "I sometimes wonder if you are fit to be the ambassador- not because I think you are lacking, of course not-it's just," Asgore sighed deeply. "You are just a child. You shouldn't deal with politics and whatever stuff we adult get to, you're supposed to play, to dream. I sometimes fear that placing such large burdens on your shoulders were unwise."

After breaking the barrier, Frisk was able to talk to Gerson more. They found out that Asgore was crowned king very young. Despite most of the Underground undermining his strength, he proved them all wrong. Perhaps-

"I guess I better return you home. The others must be worried sick."

"I sent them a text while you were talking." They said sheepishly. "We could stay for a few more minutes."

Asgore beamed at the child.

"Asgore?" 

"Yes, child?"

"Why do you keep repeating those words on your journal?"

Frisk has read variois things they shouldn't have while exploring the underground. If they didn't want them snooping around, the monster's should have locked the objects away from prying eyes.

Asgore was panicking. Surely they haven't read the final page.

"Because it's true. Everyday is a wonderful day." He lied through his teeth.

Frisk sent them another look and Asgore bit his lip. 

"You have to understand, Frisk. The people of the Underground needed a king. They didn't need a grieving father nor a hopeless crybaby for a ruler. They needed hope and they needed a king that could lead them properly. They needed a strong ruler."

But sometimes it was too much.

Frisk stayed silent, listening as the king tried to keep the tears at bay.

"I tried to convince myself that everything will be alright just so I could face my people and be the king they need. To be strong despite everything."

Asgore let out a chuckle.

"And I can do it. I could smile and dress up like Santa for Papyrus. I could encourage Alphys and her experiments. I could train Undyne until both of us are exhausted amd end up drinking tea. I can be what they need me to be but-" Asgore lost his words.

"Sometimes it's too much." Frisk said as they hugged the king.

The tear shed without him noticing.

He tightened his grip around Frisk. 

"Yes, sometimes I just need a break. I need some time to gather my thoughts and contain any...weaknesses before they get seen by anyone. I don't need people to tell me that everything will be fine because I know they aren't. I don't like being alone. I just-" his voice broke and so did Frisk's heart. 

"I miss them. I just miss them so much. I want to be with Toriel again, I want to see Asriel again. I just want my family back."

Frisk was openly crying in Asgore's arms. All these tears were bottle up for decades. It was no secret that Asgore was feeling guilty but he managed to hide it all with a big smile and warm hug. He hid for years and nobody noticed.

"We-we should get back." Asgore stated but not letting go of Frisk. The child tightening their grip on the giant monster.

"Heh," Asgire chuckled. 

"I don't want to let go." Frisk tightened their grip further, more tears shedding. There's no question who Asriel took after from.

They stayed like that for a minute or two before Asgore pulled away. Frisk wiped their tears away as they marveled at the dry eyes of the king, as if nothing happened. It was no wonder how he was able to hide all his sorrow from his subjects but then again, barely leaving New Home helped in his facade of perfect confidence.

If it weren't such a pitiful sight, they'd warn Mettaton about their title of best actor in Underground.

"Let's get you home."

* * *

The gang assaulted them all with questions when they got back.

"Where have you been, you old man?" Undyne screamed at him, magical spears surrounded him.

"I was exploring the woods." Asgore replied as he ignored the spears.

"Were you lost? Because I could have sworn these woods could be trecked in less than a few hours!"

The monster king never had a chance to reply seeing as Papyrus launched himself in the scene.

"Your highness! Are you alright? You haven't been hurt have you, you've had us all worried!" 

"I am deeply sorry for the inconvenience I may have caused you. Do not worry, I wasn't harmed in any way."

"Yeah, we should give them some space. Hi **king in the mountain** is very tiring."

"SANS THAT WAS HORRIBLE"

"Well you old geezer, you'll be staying in my place for the night. I have a lot to tell you amd don't think just because we're on the surface that means we woukd stop training!"

"Of course, Undyne. Whatever you say.

* * *

 

Sometimes it may be too much for the king to shoulder the weight of his kingdom. It takes years to build and only seconds to destroy. 

Undyne was forcing him to stay the night at her place. He wasn't sure if he actually had a choice. Alphys has been talking to him more frequently. The skelebros have been oddly following him. He never found himself alone for long amounts of time, they gave him a few minutes to himself before one of them assaulted him with their presence. A monster would always be by his side whenever he's taking a stroll or just enjoying the fresh air.

He doesn't mention when Frisk doesn't let him out of their sight for more than a few hours. 

He pretends that he doesn't notice the looks Frisk throws Toriel when they invited him for dinner.

He pretends that Toriel's frown doesn't hurt him but he doesn't need to act surprised when she hands him one whole butterscotch-cinnamon pie.

Maybe everything is too much ince in a while but it's alright. The voices haven't gone away and the temptation of just giving himself the consolation prize is still present and the last page from his journal won't be going away anytime soon but that's okay. 

He is broken, he is weak and he is filled with regret. And sometimes it's just too much. But he is still Asgore Dreemur. He will lead the monsters, he is strong enough to face the pain and battle the sorrow for his people. And more often than not, his friends are willing to help him battle his demons even if they don't know it.

He sat at his bench and took out his journal.

Sometimes it's too much but-

_"Today is getting better."_

 

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys, hope you enjoyed the story. The big guy really needs hugs. 
> 
> P.S. I know I am a mess of in-progress stories but shush! I was swept by the Man on the Internet and their fabulous "Undertale the Musical".. just when I thought i escaped the fandom it drags me back by the ankles.
> 
> Anyway, please let me know what you think!


End file.
